Small Thoughts for Small Minds

For some reason (read "TV"), Dyson started bugging me to build a rocket for him. Since Kel & Keira were doing a "girls’ day" on Saturday, I promised Dyson that we would build a rocket.

Not a rocket that could really fly.

And not a rocket with a little door that he could open and put in SpongeBob and Patrick. And it wouldn’t include miniature figures of SpongeBob and Patrick…

So, we went to Lowe’s and I picked out various sizes of schedule 40 PVC pipe, associated fittings, some 1/4" poplar project board and a "For Sale" sign.

Once we got home, Barley (who had joined us on the ride) jumped out of the truck, ran into the garage and immediately peed all over the ramp. Dumb ass dog…

After I cleaned that up, gave Dyson the McD’s Happy Meal, and set up the new wireless router, we started building the rocket.

By "we", I mean that I started working on it while Dyson continuously whined about wanting to go inside and watch the SpongeBob DVD that we picked up at Best Buy. I told him that if he didn’t want to "help" me, then he wouldn’t get a rocket. (What a mean daddy I am…)

The "For Sale" sign formed the nose cone and the stabilizer fins on the final stage (which can be removed for convenient play - the final stage, that is, not the fins…).

The main fins are cut from the project board. Since I don’t have a jig saw, I had to use the table saw to make a bunch of parallel cuts, break off the "comb teeth" and use the Dremel grinding tool to reach the pencil line.

While I was doing all this, Dyson was shredding a piece of Styrofoam. I convinced him to participate in the cleaning up portion of the endeavor…

(Kel took Dyson away during the "cussing loudly" phase as I tried to superglue the top stabilizer fins on - plastic on plastic dries slowly - no absorbtion - but it dries quickly on my fingers…)

He’s played with it quite a bit since I finished it. That should end soon…

As I mentioned in the previous post, I wanted to test the ramp using Jerry as a Nana-surrogate.

Using the "transfer chair" that we got after Donna’s mom died, I easily pushed Jerry down the ramp. No slippage, no lose of control. Then I turned the chair around and pushed him back up. I had to push down on the, umm, wheelie lever thingie in the back to lift up the front wheels to go over the edge of the plywood (I had put a 45 degree angle on it, which was the most I could do with my circular saw, but it wasn’t enough). Other than that, no problem at all. And that wasn’t a real problem.

At least for me.

Then I thought, well, Jerry & I won’t always be around. Can the ladies do it? So I asked Karen to try.

First she pushed Jerry down the ramp. The chair started to get away from her and she (and the chair) was moving pretty fast by the time she hit the bottom.

Hmm…

Then she turned the chair around and headed back up. First problem - her flip-flops slipped on the garage floor (we’ve got some type of semi-gloss paint on the garage floor which can be incredibly slippery if at all wet). Then she had trouble pushing the chair over the plywood lip. After she pushed Jerry about two-thirds up the ramp, her shoes were slipping and she got very concerned, "Doug! Take the wheelchair!" (But, as a social scientist, I can’t interfere with what I am observing, can I?)

So, it seemed imperative to put the anti-skid material on the ramp - plus on the garage floor. Also, I needed a smoother transition from the floor to the ramp.

Back to Lowe’s…

I picked up a gallon of "Skid-Not" skid resistant coating. ("Skid resistant"? Don’t commit much, huh?) I also bought a 3" wide piece of flat steel bar and a couple anti-skid adhesive backed strips.

Here’s how it now looks:

It’s hard too tell, but the surface of the ramp IS actually rough. We couldn’t try it out, though. The paint isn’t dry yet…

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention… Not only did I do this stuff, I also moved the mailbox to the other side of the road. Lots of digging in the mid 90’s. Whew. By the time I finished building the ramp yesterday, I was smellin’ like an old goat. And THEN I worked on the table saw. The garage cools down much more slowly than the outside does…

Oh well, off to the Bahamas tomorrow…

(Which means I’ll be in an airport or airplane when Nana comes home. And for the rest of the week. But, she’ll have so many family members around, she probably won’t notice my absence. Heck, if she can just get through the first day of Dyson’s gabber….)

Kel’s mom moves back home tomorrow.

The past couple of days I’ve been trying to get the house ready for her, based on a walk-through of the house by a couple of her therapists.

First, and foremost, was a way to get her IN the house. I built a ramp up the steps between the house and the garage. ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) specifies that there is a one foot run for every inch of rise.

They specifically PROHIBIT any slope greater than a 8" run/1" rise.

But, I decided to go against that recommendation for two reasons:

1. Kel’s mom will NOT be operating the wheelchair by herself. It will always be pushed by one of us.
2. To go with that small of an angle would require more space than is available in my garage. I could put a long ramp up the the back deck, but that’d require paving the walkway in the back (gravel’s not good for wheelchairs) plus there is a three inch lip up to the house from the deck - more ramps. So, that would leave a long ramp into the front stoop. Kel’s mom will not be leaving the house that often and the degree of investment seems absurd given the return. (Am I too cold and calculating? Kel agreed with my logic, though…)

One of Nana’s therapists suggested a ramp like this. The six foot ramp seemed to be the best fit for our space, but $270 for a basic ramp seemed a bit excessive, so I decided to build one myself…

I went to Lowe’s and picked up a sheet of the thickest plywood that they had (23/62") and a few two by four studs. For less than $30, mind you…

Those who’ve seen some of my other projects (deck at the old house, kid’s castle playground) know that I tend to over-design. Here’s what the bottom of the ramp looks like:

A close up of the part that fits over the stairs:

I drilled two holes in the step to take the pegs (one per side):

That way, if necessary, I can remove the ramp easily, but it stays firmly in place.

I bolloxed the angle measurement, and had to use my belt sander to get it sit flat on the floor and step. Ah well…

Here’s the ramp, in place:

I need to get some anti-skid material to cover the ramp. I’ll have Jerry sit in the wheel chair to test it out - he’s about the same weight as Nana…

It’s not pretty, but nothing in the garage is pretty. Well, Kel’s car is pretty nice…

The therapists said that Nana would need a grab bar to get into (and out of) the shower. For that to work, I had to take off the glass doors. (I still need to fill the screw holes with some silicone caulk…)

Since there wasn’t a stud in the right place to mount the grab bar, I had to improvise.

But to do what I wanted to do, I needed my table saw, which was still in the boxes (since Christmas - thanks Kel!).

So I spent a total (last night and this morning) of about eight hours putting the damned thing together…

All to rip one little piece of wood…

Here’s the grab bar, installed. Maybe Kel will decide to paint the wood - that falls outside of my household responsibility…

I also put in a shower curtain & rod, and I replaced the shower head with a cheap handheld shower head. Once we see her requirements, we may want to get a different model (which is why I didn’t spend much on this one).

We currently have a shower seat in that shower, but Nana’s therapists suggested that she would have trouble sitting down on it (and getting back up), even with the grab bar. So, I’ve ordered this model. Hopefully it will get here soon. In the mean time, the home care aide can help her, I’m sure. (This stuff is freakin’ EXPENSIVE!)

We also had to make some modifications to her bed. First, the bed was too high. So I had to take off the wheels and put some furniture slides under the legs. Second, she’ll need rails to transfer in/out of the bed. I ordered one of these rails. It’s supposed to be compatible with the Craftomatic bed. If it works out, we may order a second one for the other side to give Nana a little more flexibility. (Her right arm is still basically useless, so she might want to get out of the bed on the opposite side from where she gets in.)

Her therapists have been working with a local supplier to get a low, narrow wheelchair. Supposedly Medicare will pay for this. While they are working on getting the custom chair, they’ve provided a loaner. They have also procured a raised toilet seat with arm rests so she can more easily transfer from the wheelchair to the toilet. I still need to find a grab bar that I can mount from the floor to the wall next to the toilet to help her get up. (The arm rests on the toilet seat may not be sufficiently strong or stable.)

I know Nana is very nervous about leaving her cocoon at the "Skilled Nursing Facility".

Hopefully she’ll realize that we don’t need her to go back to doing what she did before. Hopefully she’ll realize that she’ll have all the help she’ll need. Plus, she’ll be surrounded by family.

Hopefully she’ll be happy to be home…

Joe & I decided to build our own version of Dogfish Head Brewery’s Randall the Enamel Animal, also known as a "organoleptic hop transducer module".

Joe picked up a whole house filter and I ordered some stainless steel parts. (Amazingly enough, I needed some parts that I didn’t already have on hand. Weird, huh?)

To filter out the hops, I cut to length the (stainless steel) stem from a standard beer keg. It was the perfect OD (outside diameter). I was able to use two short lengths of 1" ID (inside diameter) clear vinyl hose to center it and hold it in place, as well as connect it to the output. Hmm. That doesn’t make much sense… maybe I’ll take a picture or two next time I take it apart…

Anyway, I drilled about twenty holes (3/64" diameter) in the section of stem.

Here it is loaded up with (I think) three ounces of hops…

Here it is in operation.

It causes the beer to be cloudy. The one on the left is straight from the keg and the one on the right ran through the Hopper…

The hops need to be REALLY fresh. Also, you can’t leave the hops in too long (more than a week or two) or you’ll get a really grassy flavor.

We probably won’t use it much - maybe just the homebrew club campouts…

If you know me at all, you know that I build a big playground in our back yard.

Here’s a little reminder…

I’ve been working on this since August 2005. (Yeah, I’m slow…)

Last week we got a letter from the "developer" of the subdivision in which we live. Kel and I knew that the land was part of that subdivision, but our house is on the highway, not on the subdivision roads. Our house is not built to the same designs and standards as the rest. (The only wooden house, not brick like the rest.) We both remember being told that we were not subject to the restrictive covenants of the subdivision.

Yeah, I know. "Ignorance of the law is no excuse."

The restrictions, etc., were included with the contract, so we had no excuse.

One line states, "…garden houses and detached garages will be authorized and such satellite structures shall be in keeping with the architecture of the principal residence and will be further subject to the approval of the Owner-Developer, their heirs, and assigns."

Another line states, "All house plans and exterior elements for all residences shall be subject to the approval of the Owner-Developer…"

The letter we received stated that they had received complaints and that the addition of the "satellite structure" was not submitted for approval and approval was not issued. They then made it clear that we had to "correct the violation".

First, is a swingset/playground a satellite structure? It certainly isn’t anything like a "garden house or detached garage". Also, several of our neighbors have swingset/playground units:

Okay, the one I built is more than a wee bit larger, but shares many common elements - swings, slide, roof. The two shown above are about 10 or 11 feet tall at the peak of the roof. Mine is about 18 feet tall.

A matter of scale, but not substantiatively different…

Second, the male half of the Owner-Developer couple mows part of our neighbors yard (including the hill side behind the playground, in front of the evergreens). He’s seen every step I’ve taken during the past 18 months. He’s had every opportunity to object. Certainly before I spent over $2000 and hundreds of hours. While I didn’t have explicit approval, it certainly (and practically) seems that I had implicit approval.

Kel and I were extremely upset. (As were the kids, of course!)

I’ve since had several conversations with the female half of the couple and she’s come around to accepting it if I paint it the same color as the house (which was the original plan - except I was going to make it look like blocks of rock) and if I replace the blue roof with roofing tiles like those on the house. I may plant a few trees to block the view a bit as well…

Jeez.

It took all of my self control to talk politely to this lady. Thank goodness I was able to stay calm. Otherwise, I’d probably be hiring a lawyer about now…

There are several modifications I’ve been meaning to make to my mash tun.

Since I was gone the past two weekends and will be gone next weekend (for work), I took the day off before heading out again. (And Dyson took the day off from "school" to hang out with me.)

I’ve recently purchased a low speed gearmotor (just under 10 RPM) to use for a mash-mixer. But I wasn’t sure what kind of mixing blade to use. I settled on an aluminum fan blade from a car. (eBay, of course.)

It took some work to couple them together. I used a copper pipe as a shaft extension. First I had to hog out the center hub on the fan blade. Then, I needed a "sleeve" to take up the space between the copper pipe and the motor shaft. For the sleeve, I used a thin-walled brass tube (left over from the time when I build an Uilleann pipe (Irish bagpipe) for Kel, which has been put into storage, of course…)

For a lid, I chose a premade circular bar table (I guess). It’s made of soft pine, so if it works, I’ll have to treat it somehow…

Here it is (in temporary/testing form):

If it works, the capacitor will be mounted (somehow) in my brewing control cabinet.

Then, I wanted to take out the existing floatswitch and put the return manifold in its place. (For one, I didn’t like the position of the floatswitch, and for two, the manifold (as I built it previously) was too heavy to be mounted to the lid.)

This is probably the heaviest damned manifold in the history of brewing"

I have a LOT of stainless steel fittings. Might as well use them…

Here it is mounted in the mash tun:

One of the concerns that I had with the mash-mixer was stability. (Especially after I bent the fins up trying to hog out the hub…) So, I replaced the elbow fitting in the center with a tee, used a 1/2" to 3/8" bushing, and then a 3/8" NPT to 1/4" hose barb. The copper tube shaft extension of the mash-mixer fits loosely over the hose barb, to keep it from "wandering".

(Sorry for the bad picture - my camera’s not that good at closeups - especially in low light conditions…)

Here’s the stuff in place. There is a 1 1/2" "observation" hole in front of the motor, and the float switch in back of the motor (the SS elbow).

One problem is the big gap between the lid (board) and the rim of the mash tun (inside the keg):

(The copper pipe is for the mash-mixer. The SS nipple is for the float switch, which I can raise depending on the batch.)

If everything works, I’ll put some insulation above the lip and below the lid around the outside.

Here’s what it looks like inside:

The blades will rotate counter-clockwise. This will bring the grist down the outer edges and back up the middle. We’ll see if it helps with the stuck mash that I had last batch…

Hopefully, I’ll actually have a free day to brew so I can test it…

I finally finished up the crenellations on Saturday. I had maybe 2/3 or 3/4 of the boxes built, but none were attached. Five plus pound wooden blocks sitting on a rail eleven feet over the ground, above where small children are playing. Just waiting for a stiff wind. What a recipe for disaster. (Luckily fate hasn’t been cooking…)

I still need to put in the three screens in the back of the sandbox, put up the "drawbridge" ramp into the sandbox, build a door at the entrance of the sandbox, and rip some boards to fit in the gaps.

After all of that is done, Kel is gonna paint it "rock" gray, and we’ll paint outlines of rocks to give it the appearance of a real castle.

The only time Keira will play in it is when other kids visit. Dyson will go out if Kel or I go with him. Kel sometimes goes out and plays in the sandbox after work. (I think the stress of annual budget time is getting to her…)

It has been a tiring and painful three days. I’ve worked on the playground all day long, each day. Often to the point of heat exhaustion - hands shaking, face red, etc. Of course, half the changes aren’t visible in the picture. Oh well. No work today. I think I’ve earned a bit of a break…

While I’ve never been one for displays of allegiance, Dyson got excited about getting an American flag when we were at Lowe’s yesterday. I am still planning to put together some type of family flag (maybe an historic coat of arms for the family name, assuming we can find one) but in the meantime, we shall proudly fly Old Glory. (Once we replace the flag on the playground, we’ll probably put the American flag up on the front of the house, at least for as long as it lasts - it is a very cheap flag….)

Next, pictures of Keira as a geisha and Dyson as Superman…